A simple sorry can solve so many problems

I had some frustrations this week, and most of them could have been solved with that one little word. Recess issues happen. Every day. In (I would imagine) every classroom. And, at times, those recess issues spill back into the classroom because someone's feelings are hurt and they don't think the other person's behaviors have received enough adult attention. We had one of these instances earlier this week, unfortunately, and what made it difficult was that one student involved in the situation is a student who lacks the ability to see the fault in her actions...ever (I will call her Student A). Typically recess issues can be solved with a quiet conversation just outside the classroom door. In this case, the two individuals in question made a very public display of their dislike for each other, and it was right at the beginning of my TRIBES time as we were just getting into a community circle. I informed them that I would offer my services to help them solve their dispute when they were both calm, but they felt the need to air their grievances in the community circle. So we put our TRIBES skills to use. However, once it became clear that Student A was not being honest with her description of the timeline of events and had broken our tribal agreements, I told both the students that it seemed as though each of them had made some mistakes with how they handled the situation--this was a small problem that the two have them had turned into a big problem. So my ruling was that they should each take responsibility for their part of the problem (at this point you should refer back to my earlier insight about Student A and her difficulties with self-reflection). Student A refused to make amends for her actions when she was in the community circle (one thing you should also know about her is that she doesn't like to look "bad" in front of the other students), so I offered her the opportunity to finish this interaction in the pod, away from the class, and she took it. However, once out in the pod, she still refused. So I reminded her that if she wanted to be a part of our classroom she would need to follow the expectations and agreements. Being rather stubborn, she had some rather disrespectful comments to make, so I had her take a break in the pod and told her she could rejoin us when she was ready to act like a member of our class. Now, I'll be honest, the thoughts that were in my head were not as calm as they are right now (I know I could have handled everything better, as well), and I really wanted to simply shout, "YOU MESSED UP AND COULD EASILY FIX IT!" But that wouldn't have accomplished anything. So she took her break, came back in (still very sour and not ready to fix anything) and sat in the corner (by her own choice, not mine), and eventually came around. But I didn't let her rejoin the class activities until she fully took responsibility for her actions, apologized, and got caught up on the work she missed while on break. She and I had a one-on-one meeting later, and I actually got the truth of what happened (she was, indeed, at fault and the cause of the whole problem; again, not wanting to look bad in front of others, she would rather lie...even though the class already knew she was lying because the whole thing happened in front of them outside. But her awareness of how others see her is a totally different topic of its own). The thought process of a third grader is sometimes a very complicated thing...

Mindfulness thought for the week: The difference between ordinary and extraordinary is that little extra. --Jimmy Johnson 
We had such a cool discussion about this quote. One of the students said, "Doing just a little extra for someone can make a big difference in their life." That made me one proud teacher!